save your fork, there’s pie!

 “A homemade pie with a flaky crust is one of life’s greatest joys. Such a crust is airy, yet has texture. It makes its presence known without being assertive. It displays one of the great struggles of the universe, the tension between being and nothingness, right there in a 9-inch pie pan.”  ~ Rob Kasper, Baltimore Sun

           
         Poster reproduced by permission,  ©  copyright 2008 Julie Paschkis,
         all rights reserved

Boy, do I need some pie. 

Last week, I had to give my dentist $2400. I mean, I like him and everything — he was surprised that someone as young as me (hee) could idolize Bob Dylan, and he confessed that he ate 6-year-olds for breakfast. I like a man with a good appetite. But $2400? 

And then on Saturday I was all set to try some turnip cakes because of Tricia. But after driving all the way to our favorite dim sum restaurant, we discovered it was gone. Mamma Lucia’s had taken over. Damn those meatballs! We then tried to console ourselves with some sushi, and just for a moment, I thought things would be okay. Then our Japanese Clark Kent waiter said something terrible: “Thank you, Ma’am.”

      
               AAAAARRRRGGHHHHHHHHHH!

It was the fourth time somebody had called me “Ma’am” in just three days.

Do you think my loose neck skin gave me away? My size 16 bloomers? Nah. It was probably my old teeth, teeth only a dentist could love.

See why I need to inhale some serious pie?

Comfort me, calm me, fill me, appease me. I love you, pie.

     
Hello, banana cream, so cool, smooth, the true essence of puddin’ and pie and happy childhood days.

     
Sing to me, fresh apple, all warm, cinnamon-y, and bubblin’ over with homespun goodness.
                            
Lay it on me, lemon meringue, with your airy mountain of dreaminess, beautifully blending all that is tangy and sweet.  

    
Tempt me, pecan, with your perfect pairing of nutty crunch and brown sugar ooze.

            
Thank you, pumpkin, rich with spices and memories of family gathering round.

  
Pretty please me, peach, with the essence of summer and the South will rise again!

So bring on the shortcrust, double crust, and crumbs. Make room for some brown betty, cobbler, and buckle. Hide your chicken and pull out the pasties. June’s for celebrating pie, glorious pie. 

Sugar pie, chess pie, custard and tart. 
Sweetie pie, cutie pie, you’ve stolen my heart!

Tell me, wouldn’t you just die without pie?

What’s your favorite?                                               

Serving a special piece of gratitude for Jules of 7-Imp, who pointed me to Julie’s divine “Eat Pie” poster!

28 thoughts on “save your fork, there’s pie!

  1. So sorry about the “ma’am”s. I know all too well how painful they can be. Can these youngins possibly think they are really being polite? hmmpfff.
    I’m must confess. Pie does nothing for me. I can easily pass it up. Almost always in favor of chocolate cake.

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  2. I don’t think I could ever pick a favorite pie! It just depends on my mood and they’re all so different. My favorite fruit pie? Cherry, but Peach in the summertime is a close second. For Thanksgiving I will always choose Pecan over Pumpkin. My Granny Gin’s Chocolate Pie is to die for and fortunately my sister learned how to make it.

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  3. Hmmmm, no pie for you? Not even chocolate cream?
    I should be used to “ma’am” by now, having lived in VA for over 25 years — and I know that most of the time people are being polite. But still. One time I actually asked a young whippersnapper not to call me that, and he switched to “guys.” I saw his dilemma. I was too old for “Miss,” and I thought I was too young for “Ma’am.”
    Maybe “Your Highness” would be okay :).

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  4. I know what you mean. It depends on the season, and whether it’s homemade, and definitely on your mood. Pecan is a good wintertime pie for me, but Thanksgiving wouldn’t be the same without pumpkin. That chocolate pie sounds heavenly!

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  5. I’m not a fruit eater so most fruit is out but a good pumpkin or pecan or, come on, just a chocolate cream pie that melts in my mouth. Yum.
    I’m not fond of mam’m either.

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  6. Please don’t make me choose. I like too many pies. Cherry, raspberry, blackberry, blueberry, mixed berry, apple, pumpkin, peach, peach-berry, chocolate silk, peanut butter, shoofly (with a wet bottom, of course), lemon, key lime, pecan, banana cream. I’m certain I’m forgetting something. And then there are the savory pies: spinach, shepherd’s, Cornish pasties (a kind of pocket-pie), and more. Mmmmmm. Pie.

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  7. You probably don’t hear “Ma’am” very often in California; I never heard it in Hawai’i. How do waiters or sales people address you?
    No fruit? That’s interesting. Not even the all-American apple?

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  8. My mom makes fruit pies from their own fruit trees and everybody loves them, but I just can’t go there…the fruit seems to taste worse, not better, even with all that sugar.
    BUT…the New Basics Cookbook makes a Peanut Butter Chocolate pie that is, just about literally, to die for. Many people I’ve made it for can’t eat it–its that rich and sweet, but I don’t seem to have a problem with it!

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  9. Peanut Butter Chocolate pie — sounds like a giant Reese’s wrapped in a crust! I imagine it would be yummy with vanilla ice cream to cut some of that sweetness, or just eaten in smaller servings, like cheesecake. But I’m jealous of those fruit pies made with homegrown fruit! We used to have an apple tree at our old house, along with blueberry and strawberry plants — all made wonderful pies.

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  10. Offhand, I recall references to eating goose and mutton (but not in pie) and to eating some nice, cold souse. I shall, however, get a pie-specific answer to you in a bit.

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  11. Oh, regarding ma’am…
    Maybe it’s a regional thing, but I call everyone “ma’am” here. I was brought up to say “yes ma’am” and “no ma’am” to anyone that was older than me. I just see it as respectful. I was just thinking…it’s not necessarily just women that are older than me…if I was at a store and someone asked me if I needed anything else I would probably say “no ma’am” regardless of her age. Maybe I should stop that??? lol

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  12. Mmmmm, I love me some blueberry pie, warm and cozy, but apple pie is good, too!
    I think ‘Ma’am’ is coming into more common usage — I’m only 17 and I’ve been called ‘ma’am’ several times at various stores. So don’t fret!

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  13. Re: Oh, regarding ma’am…
    Yes, it does seem regional, but as people are so mobile these days, it’s becoming more widespread. I know I shouldn’t take offense. But I need more excuses to bemoan my aging :)!

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  14. Thanks, I feel better now. But aren’t you in Canada? I thought “Ma’am” was Southern U.S. Up there I’d expect to hear “Mum” or something :)!

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  15. Boy howdy, doesn’t that poster look good on here?!
    I’m so glad I stopped by. I’m on blog-break this week, and I figured that included a break from reading others’ blogs, but you see that I can’t stay away from yours.
    My favorite pie: Anything chocolately and peanut-buttery together.
    $2400. Yikes. I’m so sorry.
    Jules, 7-Imp

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  16. I LOVE LOVE LOVE that poster. Thanks so much again for pointing me to it!
    Another choco-peanut butter freak, I see. I guess there are fewer fruits out there than I predicted :).
    I keep thinking how many books and CDs I could have purchased with $2400.

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