I’m back! You look different. Have you had some work done? Eating more fruits and veggies, maybe?
Well, something’s changed.
I swear you’re even more good-looking than you were back in July. Tell me, tell me — how is that even possible?
When last we spoke, 6lueberries were taking over the Alphabet Soup kitchen. Well, you’ll be pleased to know we polished off every last one of those indigo beauties and haven’t had any other grocery shopping mishaps — unless you count the time I asked Len to bring home a spaghetti squash.
Me: That’s not a spaghetti squash. It has a pointy end.
Len: Of course it’s a squash.
Me: It looks too small.
Len: Well, I found it next to all the other squashes and there was even a big sign.
Len: Don’t be silly. This. is. a. squash.
Me: Hokay, if you insist . . .
Marinara sauce simmering, smells good.
Two hours later, a scream from the kitchen.
Len: OH NO!!
Frantic, disheveled writer comes running, expecting to see a gaping knife wound and lots of blood.
What?!! What’s wrong?!!
Len: Look! It’s a . . . MELON!
Writer displays admirable restraint.
Me: Is it a muskmelon?
Len: I don’t know.
Me: Well, I tried to tell you. This is just like Aunty Ella and her Chinese soup fiasco. Instead of winter melon, she got watermelon. So much for our low cal alternative. I’ll cook some penne . . .
Turns out the object in question is a canary melon, and it was delicious! I like it better than cantaloupe but not as much as honeydew. Canary melons are also called winter melons, but they’re not the same “winter melons” my aunt wanted for her soup, which are actually winter gourds. These guys are actually fruits eaten as vegetables. I swear it’s all a conspiracy. Squash espionage abounds. Henceforth, my code name is Melon Head. 🙂
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